Test your Assumptions

#YoungProfessional

As we go through our day we communicate and interact (even now virtually) with multiple stakeholders. These interactions happen often and rapidly, and since we can’t constantly ask people what they mean or how they feel about things, therefore we have to rely on inferences or assumptions we make. The issue though is, what happens when these assumptions take only one possible scenario without considering the rest because again they have to be done often and as quickly as possible? Well as you might’ve either expected or experienced, this results in miscommunications and frustrations. Why should we care ? Well, personally it can be demoralizing, and collectively it can weaken teams and collaborative cultures.

What can we do about it? Short Answer: Test our Assumptions, Long Answer: Lets take a few examples:

A: You work on some extra tasks assigned by your manager, you do a good job yet get no feedback so you assume your manager isn’t appreciative.

B: You ask a colleague to share an important document with you, he/she comes back saying they don’t have time right now. You go back explaining how important this is for both of your teams, frustrated that you even have to explain this. You assume that this colleague isn’t good at prioritization or is quite lost.

Let’s start with case A:

Now look I’m the last person to defend managers, but turns out even they have a side to the story. It’s true that one possibility could be that your manager is in reality not appreciative but let’s take a look at some other possibilities.

• They plan to bring it up in your monthly or quarterly review which is the time they consider appropriate for feedback, rather than when you completed the task.
• They think this is on par with your usual good work and therefore doesn’t require recognition (problematic but happens)
• You ask your manager a few weeks later of why they thought that task wasn’t done well since you heard nothing back to which you’re surprised to hear “you actually did a good job, if it wasn’t done well i would’ve highlighted what you need to improve”

See, we assume that feedback is a given however in reality it varies a lot depending on the manager’s style of work. For the sake of feedback, let’s look at 3 styles of managers. I’m sure there’s plenty more styles of management, but these are the ones that I think can help determine where we stand.

The 3 styles: Some managers provide constant feedback whether positive or negative, some only highlight negative things that need enhancements and their silence usually means you’re doing well, and some provide no feedback at all unless prompted.

So what to do? Basically, if you have a manager whom provides constant feedback, that’s the first style and you’re probably not reading this anyways. If your manager only provides negative feedback, ask them to share with you examples of actions that could lead you to get a positive feedback. If your manager provides no feedback at all and you’re waiting for them to wake up one day and remember that you exist and need some direction, I’m sorry to tell you that day won’t come. Good news though, schedule a meeting with that manager and bluntly ask for feedback and explain that it’s important for your growth and sense of direction with your tasks. What I find helpful in these cases are, give examples and initiate the process. Also, sometimes remember they’re just busy people and we need to keep pushing for their attention. (whether that’s a healthy professional relationship or not, is a topic for another post) Lastly, remember that no noise (in most cases) is usually good news whether from a manager or a business customer. If there’s an issue, they’ll be the first and quickest to let you know, so probably you’re doing well if there’s silence.

If all that still doesn’t help, I’d get another opinion preferably from a mentor you trust and have met your manager on whether there is in face a bigger issue at hand that needs to be addressed differently. In the end, we all know we don’t live in Narnia and not everything works out as planned.

Now case B:

It’s also true that some people can be careless, but let’s assume they’re as hardworking as you are, what else could be causing this lack of alignment on important KPIs (Key Performance Indicators)?

• This colleague is new to the role and haven’t been properly trained on what are the important KPIs for both teams and not just his/her team
• This colleague is actually busy and even though he/she knows your document is important, has no actual time to get it done as he/she is overwhelmed with other more urgent tasks
• This colleague has issues at home they’re dealing with at the same time

If it’s cases 1 or 2, it would be a reoccurring thing that will actually need to be brought up and addressed. If it’s case 3 then we can all understand the need of being supportive and helpful in such situations. How do you know which is which? Talk to the colleague and ask them in a respectful manner if they’re aware of the importance of this KPI, if not: why and how the team can support on clarifying important KPIs, if yes: then what’s causing the delay and how can you support them?

I think it seems trivial but when it comes to our team members we excuse them rather than judge them, as we work with them daily and relatively know them more than others. While with managers and other teams we judge first and excuse maybe later.

So the next time you face such a frustrating scenario, maybe take a minute to test your assumptions before taking them as a given. At the end of the day we’re all trying our best. (Unless if you’ve tested your assumptions and they’re actually awful, then yep you were right and in the wise words of Justin Bieber “they can go and love themselves” #itsajoke #dont@me )

Let me know if you’ve found any of this helpful, or if maybe you’d like a part#2 with more scenarios and examples? Comment below as I’d actually like to read your responses and reply back to them.

Till Next time 🙂 !